These days, wigs have a decidedly mixed reputation. First we have the "sexy and sassy" wigs. The ones we see on models, rock stars and TV news anchors. But then we have those other ones — the wigs with the secret and scary rep. These are the wigs that come with whispers. "Is she sick?" "Is it chemo?"
Well, I am about to do the unthinkable. I will not whisper about those wigs; instead I am on full volume to let you know that the world needs to add some whimsy to the remaining wisps that can make women cry. Women lose their hair for lots of reasons. Yes, cancer and chemotherapy is where the mind first goes, but lots of other causes exist too, from alopecia to just plain old age. We lose our hair too often to be merely a group of faint voices behind closed doors.
Many of us invest a lot of our self image in our hair. Let me be clear: my hair has always been very much part of my physical image and I happen to like it a lot. So when my scalp started showing up everywhere and I found clumps of hair in the sink and in the shower? Let's just say the tears came. And then came again after the next shower. And came yet again just because they did. All the awful possibilities run through your head. You wonder how you will ever be sexy again. How your partner will see you when you get into bed. Whether everyone will know.
But I think I found my answer to the misery — and now I need the wig world to help me execute on my plan.
Because I am looking at this as a spectacular opportunity to have my dream hair. The hair I always wanted but my genetics just didn't cooperate. Each and every day. And if tomorrow I want to be platinum blonde, well, there is a wig to make that happen. Curls to my butt? Done. Sexy auburn waves? Done. I'm taking the wigs of whispers and making them spring break wet and wild. And will everyone know I am wearing a wig? Damn straight they will, because I will show them off as the transformative fashion accessory they are. I will have my luxury wig and my costume wigs. My black tie wig and my comfy sweats wig. Welcome to the many new versions of me. We are all different but we have one thing in common: sensational hair, each and every damn day.
But the wig world needs to catch up because as of now it is plain old whisper-promoting depressing. When women go to the hair salon, they are asked "what would you like to do with your hair today?" Because a woman's new hairstyle is the future her, the one she is thrilled to become. Her new hair is her dream, not her damnation.
But a woman at a wig store? Dreams are seriously discouraged. The shaming starts early — at the moment you make your appointment and you are guaranteed your private time and your oh so private room. Message: you have something to hide, something embarrassing and shameful. The first question to me was "have you started treatments yet?" Followed by reassurances that my hair could be replicated — although "of course" I intended to cut my hair off, right?
I reject all of this. Yes, women should have places where they can peacefully and, yes, privately, purchase a wig. If they want.
But let's face it — if you are losing your hair, you may very well have limited opportunities right now for a little glitz and glamour, a bit of frivolity and fun. Getting the hair of your lifelong dreams might just be one of the few ways you can actually take a moment in life that is totally terrible and grab some glamour from it. And yes, people will know that you did not in fact grow a foot of ebony curls overnight. But they will also know you rock ebony curls. And most importantly? You will look in the mirror, primp and preen, and then think: wow, I rock these curls more than anyone has ever rocked curls.
There have been moments in my life when someone has asked just how I managed to do this or that. And I always have the same response: well, the other option was to sit down and die.
Right now, I pore over pictures looking for my perfect hair. Because I am tired of crying over the strands of hair in the sink.
My solution isn't right for everyone. But the wig world is full of whispers; at least some of us might want — and really, really even need — some whimsy. So if you have a business plan for your new store or charity called Wig Whimsy? It's probably pretty obvious you should give me a shout.
A comprehensive guide to the causes of female hair loss, how to get a proper diagnosis, and the full spectrum of treatments available — from minoxidil to exosome therapy to surgical restoration.
Read the guide →Wigs can be prohibitively expensive for many women who need them. If you have a wig you no longer need — or long hair from which a wig can be made — please consider donating.
Check your health insurance coverage — you don't have to be undergoing chemotherapy to qualify. Hair loss results from many causes, and you may have at least partial coverage for wigs or hairpieces.