Living Today Better Identity & Purpose Confidence & Voice Provocative The Filing Cabinet

For Immediate Release

Home Inc.

REF: FC-001 · Office of Corporate Communications

Official Statement

Home Inc. Responds to Allegations of Selling Financial Services

Issued by the Office of Corporate Communications · Home Inc. · pursueyourpink.com

Home Inc. responded today to allegations that it, through one of its Members, is engaged in "selling financial services."

Home Inc. categorically denies these allegations.

Mom — Chief Executive Officer, Home Inc.

"Although I wish any Member of this Organization possessed the skill, acumen or expertise required to sell financial services, I can assure you they do not. I have had nearly nine decades to observe such things and no Member has ever shown even a hint of that kind of potential."

Anonymous Member — Identity Withheld, Citing Fear of Reprisal

"While the CEO may well be correct, it would still be nice if she consulted with my employers before making public statements on the matter."

Other Members declined to comment, citing various Policy clauses and definitions that we are unable to reproduce here because the language involved was so complex, bizarre and generally incomprehensible that we eventually stopped listening.

We continue to investigate the matter, although our inside source (identified here only as "P") also declined to comment, citing rumors that an investigation into her own social media practices may now be pending, at least according to certain unnamed Intermediaries.

Given those rumors, P stated that she now needs to "watch her back."